Recently, I’ve been rather depressed. And I mean like ‘curl up in a little ball and cry’ depressed.
I’m going through some things right now, and I’ve written about those in the past. I don’t like to put them here. On the one hand, it’s real and vulnerable. After all, everyone goes through hard times and can relate. On the other, it seems like I’m whining. After all, everyone goes through hard times and has their own stuff to worry about.
What surprised me was when a doctor asked me, “What’s the single biggest thing you do for your health?” Usually I have a million little things. Avoid processed foods. Eat veggies. Get calcium every day. Drink only water and tea. Take walks.
This time, I didn’t have an answer, because I’d stopped doing a lot of that.
Hearing that I had no reply, he asked who I talked to, who I opened up to when I had a problem. Usually I have a good support system, but lately I had been feeling cut off from everyone. The old friends that I’m comfortable discussing personal stuff with either don’t know about or aren’t comfortable with the spiritual exploration I’m doing. The new friends with whom I’m doing the spiritual exploration aren’t necessarily close enough that I’m comfortable talking about some of my personal stuff.
Later that day, I asked one of my spiritual friends if I could discuss some personal things with her. I warned her: it could get messy. She was willing, as was another spiritual friend the next day.
The next day was a fair that I was reading at. It’s nice being a vendor because we try each other out and trade services. It’s fun and it gives us an idea of what each of us can do. That means we can refer people to other practitioners if we feel they would be better off with them. For example, I can channel, but I’m just relaying a message. A friend of mine can channel, and she basically becomes the being she’s channeling, complete with accents and mannerisms. Both of us can get the job done, but we each have our own methods.
One woman who did energy readings was new, and wanted to trade. She was doing pelvic bowl healing. She said this was the seat of creativity. Her initial brush with my aura surprised her; it was full of anger. She asked if she could touch me, and after consent was given, placed her hands on my belly She tuned in to my energy and shook her head.
“I’m not feeling any coals here.”
I had stopped focusing on the things that made me happy and moved me forward on my path, and was instead focused on the day to day drudgery of life. I had literally let the fire in my belly go out.
I know so much better than that, and I did it anyway.
She helped me rekindle those coals. Between that and opening up to my friends, I felt better. A little while later, I gave her a tarot reading that confirmed she is on the right path in her life.
Don’t let the fire in your belly get cold. Your emotional, mental, and physical health suffers when you do.